Playoffs Part II
Stupid Flanders...
Man. Springfield Flanders continue to make a mockery of the 2025 Playoffs. After beating the Bandits by nearly 100-points last week, they currently lead Dark Helmet this week 224-141. How certain is victory? So certain that they are etching Flanders name on the KAOS Cup as we speak.
But who gives a crap about how Glenn’s team is doing. The rest of us are dreaming about hoisting the cup in 2026. Below, I have assembled a way to early look at who should be kept next year for each team. Please note that I based these projections on not just player performance this year (through Week 13 - our regular season final), but also the players age, contract situation, health and how good is the offense they play in. So you may wonder why I don’t have a guy like DaVante Adams as a keeper, it is because of his age and the uncertainty that is always surrounding Matthew Stafford’s health. Similarly, I have CMC on the “maybe” list for keepers. Even though he was the #1 RB this year, he has had health issues in the past and a player who has had as many touches as CMC this year (322 through week 14) have slumped badly the following year.
For example:
In 2022, Josh Jacobs was RB1 and touched the ball 400 times. In 2023, he rushed for 800 yards and ended up the RB27.
In 2024, Saquon Barkley was RB1 and had 375 touches. So far in 2025, he has rushed 740 yards and is the RB14. Not bad, but also not a slam dunk keeper.
Also, the QB overall rankings are a little wonky due to our 2-QB format but their positional rankings are accurate. Drake Maye is the 42nd overall ranked player, which I think is too low (he probably should be in the 25-30 range), but his positional ranking of QB05 is accurate.
So here is my take on who each team should keep in 2026 (Teams are listed in the preliminary 2026 draft order, pending playoff results.)
Players who are on the keeper bubble are highlighted in yellow.
